Sleep Deprivation is Pernicious

I woke up around 1:18 AM expecting my alarm to go off at any minute. What I mean by that is that I woke up and was awake. As opposed to many mornings where I wake up still asleep for some time.

I did some browsing on Patty (the iPad), which is never a good remedy for sleeplessness. I got up, stretched and grabbed some couch time with Cindy (the Kindle). I tried going back to bed but just ended up getting up a little bit later, resolved to start my day whatever the clock said. So, I showered in the second bathroom (we have two!) even though the water pressure doesn't hold up. I used used the Trader Joe's tea-tree tingle shampoo/conditioner as well as Dr. Bronner's peppermint soap, the result of which, my whole body is tingly. 

Doing my best to keep quiet I collected a bowl, a spoon, some cereal and some milk from the kitchen and retreated to the second bedroom / office (we really are spoiled in this apartment). If Kari had walked out she might have mistaken me for a thief, albiet one unusually concerned with breakfast items.

Now it is 4:23 AM and I am in the second bedroom / office. I know I should go back to bed and try again. I am also keenly aware of effects this will have on my day. It always happens in the slightest way. I will forget that I didn't get my required eight hours of sleep and be overcome with despair. Literally nothing in life will excite me and the thought of work, in any form, fills me with dread. I think this is called depression. However, like I said and for whatever reason, I will forget the cause. Which only deepens the emotions.

Sleep deprivation is pernicious. That is best word I can come up with.

Maybe today I will wear a ribbon around my pinky. If I can find a pink one I can tell people it is for breast cancer but really it is just to remind me "this is water."*

If you are wondering why I can't sleep, it is not a question I can easily answer. Now, all distractions aside and morning routines finished, I am forced to think about a reason. It could be work-stress. Yesterday was not a great day at the office. It could have been bad dreams. Just last night I had a dream that Craig was a psychopath and trying to murder me. What is worse is that I tried to kill him before he could kill me. I didn't succeed and psychopath Craig ended up killing me. What kind of crazy person dreams are these!

(Personal note to Craig: I am really sorry for my subconscious. I promise our relationship is sound and you are the least likely of all my friends to kill me. If anyone were to kill me it would probably be Drew)

(Personal note to Drew: I am sorry about that last comment I just thought it would be funny)

In any case it is probably a combination of stress, restless sleep and general restlessness at my last few days. I have not accomplished enough of the tasks I wanted to and ended up falling asleep just a few hours after getting home. I have noticed that many of the nights I find it hard to get to sleep, or get back to sleep, the thought that I am not fully using days is the main culprit. The temporary answer is to get to getting. Hence my current wakefulness. The long-term answer is more multi-faceted: organization, exercise, a peaceful heart, and so on. However, my guess is that these are life long pursuits and that every now and then I am going to wake up at 1:18AM.

* This is a reference to a commencement speech given by David Foster Wallace. It is really worth a listen and I won't give anything away by telling the joke which goes something like this: 

Two young fish swim by an older fish, the older fish says to them, "Hi Boys, how is the water?" One of them answers that it is fine and then, a little while later the other asks, "What is water?"

Other Photos, Other Days

I love having a camera on me all of the time.

But not all of the photographs make sense to post to Facebook,

or Instagram.

So here are some of my favorites,

from the past few weeks.

NXSW

It is the Friday before Christmas. I am still working, just remotely and currently in a busy coffee and crepe shop in the south of Salem. However, I am allowed a short break mid morning. So I am going to take 10 minutes to tell about my recent flight experience.

Southwest, is not just my new favorite airline but one of my new favorite things.

To start, last weekend Kari and I were working out logistics of our upcoming trip. Finding it easier to fly into San Diego I set out to see what it would take to change my flight from Ontario to San Diego. Having an absolutely horrible experience with changing flights in the past, I wasn't hopeful. However, southwest does not charge a fee for changing flights, just the difference in cost of the tickets, which was about twelve dollars.

I didn't realize this immediately but it was twelve dollars cheaper to fly out of San Diego. So, a few days before my flight I change tickets to San Diego and I actually get money back! I am sold at this point.

Finally, the day of the trip arrives. I show up with two bags, check them sans fees, and get on the plane. At this point the pilot announces that the flight is only about half full so that we should feel free to spread out and take up as much space as we like.

I had to transfer planes in San Jose and when I arrived I discovered that the flight was delayed by about half an hour. I didn't mind but when the delayed plane shows up and everyone gets on board the captain comes on and tells us that because we are awesome, having boarded so quickly, and because Southwest is awesome, scheduling flights with a fifteen minute buffer, we are actually going to be on time.

The Warby Parker Home Try-on Kit

I replace my glasses every two years or so and wanting a change in my occasional look, I ordered the Warby Parker home try-on set.

Basically, you pick out five sets of frames and they send you this package. You can then try on all five sets and ideally, order your favorite. Warby Parker is one of my new favorite companies because they are charitable (doing the Tom's thing but with glasses) and literary (Warby Parker is a hyrbid name from two obscure Kerouac characters)

Oh that is a picture of Redlands A.K. Smiley Public library. I just threw that in because I am about to get real superficial. Plus now that my phone has a decent enough camera, I take pictures everywhere I go and hey, isn't that a cool library.

These were my three favorite pairs... it takes almost nothing for me to drop what I am doing and take glamour shots of my self.

These are the same three photos, in a different pattern and juxtaposed against a picture from Disney's Enchanted Tiki Room.

3AM Checklist

1. Bathroom - because, well you know.
2. Glass of Water - because hydration is important.
3. Instagram - because my friends have awesome lives.
4. Flipboard - it is like Pinterest meets Reddit. Or possibly a baby that can beautifully organize all my favorite feeds... why a baby... I don't know.
5. McSweeney's Internet Tendency - because I am still in my twenties. I know the minute I turn thirty I will cease to be amused and think "these kids can't write."
6. Facebook - because, well you know. It is 3AM.
7. Catan, the app - because I just tried falling back asleep and can't.
8. Flipboard again - because I rolled the robber. Maybe I missed something.

Renaissance

I am resurrecting this blog. It might be a short rebirth - truth-be-told it might only be tonight - but I am turning again to this outlet because I think it fits me better than the rest.

Recently, I updated my life with the purchase of an iPhone and have been trying really hard to get into Instagram. Ideally it is the perfect social tool for me because it relies on images, which was the usual filter I would apply to browsing Facebook. However, right from the start I had some user issues, mainly, how to make my life look as interesting and appealing as possible. I know I am not alone in this.

However, this is a problem I could eventually get past. My life is awesome after all. But no, after applying just the right filters to my life, I then faced the issue of how to caption the damn thing. I wanted to write too much, to be witty and ironic, to tag the right people, to be appropriately conscious of the medium. The whole exercise just became too burdensome. You might think this all a little too neurotic and you would be right: #introvert #maybe #neurosis #somethingsneverchange #highschoolmemories

Then came the coup d'etat. Instead of inspiring jealously in all my friends, my 14 followers, which is a really, really questionable goal to begin with, I started feeling the tendrils of jealously* and I began to envy the awesome lives my friends are living. They do have awesome lives after all.

This, wanting to be a part of everything, has always been a struggle for me. I know Ryan and I have had conversations about it. I know it will undoubtedly continue, much like my use of Instagram. Hopefully I can stop at the happiness I feel seeing my friends successes and move on with more productive things, a category to which this blog belongs.

*Are tendrils of jealousy a thing? For some reason the only bridge in my mind between feeling and jealously is tendrils.

Strange Happenings in El Segundo

I am at a Starbucks in El Segundo waiting for my friend Evan to arrive at lax and without anyone immediate to talk to I am turning to this old thing.

First of all, I have been here about an hour and a half. A little over an hour ago started frappachino happy hour. Right before it happened the staff started really panicking and I overheard one of them saying that hopefully all of the girls don't show up right at three. I thought this was funny until an hour and a half later, the Starbucks is fully inundated with teenage girls giggling and sipping their outrageously flavored frappachinos. At least a hundred have came and went so far, it is amazingthis preteen propensity for flavored coffee slushies.

Second, I am minding my own business, doing some steel design homework when out of the crowd of girls steps a handsome looking man in a grey suit, no tie. He asks if I am doing design work or homework. I say HW and he says that's great, where do I go to school? I say UCI and as it turns out he is both a structural engineer and UCI alum. He invited me to stop by the office and I think I will, definitely, at least the next time I am in El Segundo, getting squeezed out of a Starbucks by teenagers needing a frappachino fix.

Professor 1

"This is a sparse matrix, a sparse, matrix. And mathematicians... they like."

The first professor I want to tell you about is a faculty member in the Civil and Environmental Engineering Department. He is at least a head shorter than me and always wears tan or blue slacks, a striped dress shirt and a fleece jacket. He is Chinese and did his undergraduate and first graduate degree in China and then his second and third graduate degrees at UCLA. I only share this so you will know he has a bit of a heavy accent and is pretty much brilliant. 

He makes me thankful that the whiteboard is planar because if it was multidimensional, I am sure he would write in 3D. As is, by the end of class the contents of the whiteboard make my brain explode. He never erases, has the habit of enunciating with the DryErase marker and the even worse habit of placing the marker tip on the board, starting to walk, scanning the board and finally connecting to two bits of relevant information together. 

My favorite thing about Professor 1 is that while he rarely takes a breath while lecturing, seriously he talks continuously (if you really think about it this is amazing), he has moments where he gets completely sidetracked with a philosophical or serious personal thought. For instance, last week he was lecturing and made a note of a mistake made by the author of our textbook. He then pauses for a moment, a longer moment than he has all night, frowns at the screen and says, quietly and to no one in particular, "it's ok... everyone makes mistakes sometimes."

Bonus Pictures from Eric and Arisa's Wedding

I should be studying right now but am just having too much fun reminiscing about the weekend. Instead I thought I would share a little bonus with all of you who still glance this way every now and then. 

Here are some of the pictures from last weekend that didn't make the cut for the facebook album (although I am not sure why, there is no sixty-pic limit anymore... anyways). If you have not seen the facebook album and didn't know that I was in freaking Asheville, North Carolina, well I was and here are some pictures.

 

Clearly I am the only real pro photomaker

No don't, you are so ugly when you cry

 

 The undeniable allure of the iPad

 Drew, way to mess up the spacing

 

Groom in the background, dummy in fore

 "Whether we are super rich or dirt poor (but hopefully the former)..."

 

 "Arisa, you are not a Disney Princess but I love you anyway."

 Arisa: This is magical

Eric: Who invited that guy (just keep smiling)

And then we had to search for the reception... twenty one people never made it.

"Is that a PoTAeTOE!"

 "I am confused, what else do you want from us."

 

 Huaw!!!

 

Evan: Hi I am Evan.

Guy: Please stop talking to me. 

 En route to part II of the reception, clearly no one knows who this guy is or how he is related to Eric and Arisa.

Arisa: God this is good

Eric: We were supposed to cut the cake first (I am so embarrassed, why does she always have to attack cakes with her hands like that) 

 Ryan - you better not let this one go.

Bradie - you just made love to the camera all night.

Cuddlefessst 2011!!

Something changed in the dynamic

Love amidst chaos.

 If we just had a boat, you and me could sail away.

 And wouldn't that be awesome.

GTBKOC: Diamond Jamboree and Kula Sushi

One night Kari and I were out searching for a Japanese restaurant when we stumbled upon the Diamond Jamboree shopping center. We originally headed there for one restaurant but found that one busy, luckily, we had stumbled upon the Diamond Jamboree center where every restaurant is an Asian restaurant (with the notable exceptions of a bakery and a Yogurtland) and the grocery store, H-mart, is an Asian grocery store.

Tonight I returned with good friend Brandon Woods. We went to Kula Shushi Bar, a revolving sushi bar. You sit either at the bar, or at a table with direct access to the bar. The bar itself consists of two conveyor belts that slowly revolving, bringing new plates with different types of Sushi. Each plate cost two dollars. Brandon was not phased, he had been to a rotating sushi bar in Poland or something cool like that.

I was blown away.